Dear Madam,
I seem to have fallen off the cutting edge of societal evolution, to use an old Rush Limbaugh term, because I had no idea there was a “No Kings” demonstration a couple of weeks ago in Marlinton. I’m truly getting old.
Other people were right on top of things, though. They got the word and went down to the Greenbrier River bridge and put on an old-fashioned, 1960s type demonstration. I’d loved to have been there to make signs, wave my cane about, and shout at people driving by using some of the colorful expletives that are currently making the rounds at these demonstrations. My loss.
I did read about some of the intellectual giants of the anti-Maga movement participating in these “No Kings” demonstrations around the country – giants like Jane Fonda, Robert DeNiro, Bruce Springsteen, Barbara Streisand and, of course, Luke Skywalker. There were thousands of like-minded, but not so famous, individuals that made the demonstrations, also.
Conspicuously missing, however, was Mr. Sulu. I hope his being left out of the news was something like a malfunction in the transporter and was not an Asian racist kind of thing. He brings a lot of diversity to the anti-Maga movement and would have helped with the credibility of that bunch of blue-eyed devils listed above, as Malcolm X might describe them. Additionally, who would dare deny that diversity is our strength.
I did see some coverage of the demonstrations around the country and wondered if there were any white people left in the bingo parlors and senior centers in the cities where the demonstrations were occurring. I suspect emergency services had a big day in those places, with clacking defibrillators, IV insertions, beeping blood pressure monitors and murmuring last rites.
I did see some of the reporter coverage of these demonstrations on the Fox News website and interviews with some of the participants. I was a little shocked at the language. I spent 45 years in the construction industry so I’m quite familiar with the vocabulary they used, but these folks looked like your average grandparents speaking like Joe the plumber.
Particularly impressive was the many uses to which they put the old Anglo-Saxon term for fornication. That term was stretched all over the grammatical landscape and into places I wouldn’t think possible, even dangling participles. I think with the derivatives of that term and maybe ten or twelve other words you could form up a whole new language that would be understood by leftist nutcases all over the world. Sort of like American Sign Language – simple, but expressive.
As far as the cussing goes, construction workers win hands down on quality, but grandma and grandpa win on volume. Those old folks can speak for five minutes straight and get in hundreds of fornication derivatives. It’s impressive – and a little sad.
Anyway, order was restored across the country and in our own little West Virginia town. All the old folks across the nation went back to the old folks’ home and regaled their buddies in the ancient aerobics class with their tales of “taking it to the man” and “up the revolution.” And then 9:00 p.m. rolled around, and it was a dose of NyQuil and off to bed. Add a shot of vodka and that sounds good to me.
John Jackson
Huntersville
